My experience with motherhood
It has been my dream since I started seeing my then boyfriend to someday have a cute child and to name her Shagun on my best friend's name who passed…
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In the quiet suburb of Willowdale, nestled amidst the serene surroundings of blooming cherry blossoms and chirping birds, lived Sandhya, a young woman filled with constant anticipation and anxiety. Sandhya’s heart swelled with joy at the thought of becoming a mother, yet beneath her facade of excitement lurked a torrent of fear and doubt.
Night after night, Sandhya lay awake in her bed, the soft moonlight filtering through the curtains casting shadows on her troubled face. Her mind raced with worries, each thought more terrifying than the last. What if something goes wrong? What if she loses the baby? The weight of these fears bore down on her, suffocating her with a sense of helplessness.
During the day, Sandhya tried to mask her inner turmoil with a smile, but the facade was beginning to crack. Her once vibrant energy had been replaced by a constant state of restlessness, her thoughts consumed by an overwhelming sense of dread. But when she tried to confide in those around her, their words fell on deaf ears.
“You’re overreacting, Sandhya,” they would say, their voices tinged with dismissal. “You need to relax and enjoy this precious time.”
Let’s understand what anxiety is. According to APA, anxiety is an emotion characterized by feelings of tension, worried thoughts, and physical changes like increased blood pressure, and shivering. However, anxiety disorder differs from anxiety in that it involves excessive fear or anxiety to even avoid the object or situation causing it.
But Sandhya couldn’t simply switch off her fears like a light switch. They gnawed at her like a relentless beast, refusing to be silenced. She felt isolated and alone, trapped in a prison of her own making.
Deep down, Sandhya longed to reach out for help, to seek solace in the comforting embrace of understanding arms. But the fear of being stigmatized for her mental health held her back, a heavy anchor dragging her deeper into the abyss of despair. She couldn’t bear the thought of being labeled as “crazy” or “unfit” simply for expressing her fears.
And so, Sandhya suffered in silence, her heart heavy with the burden of her anxieties. This was also affecting her pregnancy but she couldn’t communicate this to her Gynecologist as her husband always accompanied her. But little did she know, there was someone out there who understood her pain all too well.
Across town, in a cozy little cafe tucked away on a quiet street corner, sat Lily, a kind-hearted soul with a story of her own. Like Sandhya, Lily had grappled with the crippling weight of anxiety during her own pregnancy, her mind consumed by fears of the unknown.
But instead of suffering alone, Lily had found solace in the warmth of a support group, a safe haven where she could share her fears without fear of judgment. And as she sipped her steaming cup of tea, a flicker of recognition sparked in Lily’s eyes as she watched Sandhya pass by the cafe window, her face etched with worry.
In that moment, Lily knew what she had to do. Rising from her seat, she hurried out into the street, determined to offer Sandhya the lifeline she so desperately needed.
“Hey there,” Lily called out, her voice gentle yet resolute. “Going through challenges in this phase can be difficult. I know what you’re going through. And you’re not alone.”
And as Sandhya turned to face her, tears streaming down her cheeks, she felt a glimmer of hope ignite within her heart. For in that moment, she knew that she had finally found someone who understood her pain, someone who would stand by her side as she navigated the turbulent waters of anxiety and fear.
Pregnancy is often portrayed as a time of great joy, but that’s not the reality for all women.
Together, Sandhya and Lily embarked on a journey of healing, their shared experiences forging a bond that would carry them through even the darkest of nights. Lily also introduced Sandhya to a pregnancy support group where she could talk and share about her fears, wishes, emotions and anything that she wants to talk about. As they walked arm in arm through this journey, Sandhya felt a sense of peace wash over her, knowing that she was no longer alone in her struggles.
For sometimes, the greatest strength lies not in facing our fears alone, but in reaching out to others and letting them share the burden. And in the end, it is this connection, this unwavering support, that can help us find the courage to face even our deepest fears head-on.
Sarah, a young and energetic working woman, was a go-getter, always juggling multiple tasks and responsibilities with ease. But lately, something felt off. It started with a persistent feeling of restlessness, a nagging sense of unease that seemed to follow Sarah wherever she went. Then came the sleepless nights, tossing and turning as her mind raced with worries and what-ifs.
She started getting tension headaches that seemed to strike with alarming frequency, leaving Sarah feeling like she was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. Stress seemed to be creeping into every corner of her life, casting a shadow over even the simplest of tasks.
According to World Health Organization, stress can be defined as a state of worry or mental tension caused by a difficult situation. Stress is a natural human response that prompts us to address challenges and threats in our lives.
At first, Sarah brushed off these symptoms as just a normal part of modern life. After all, who wasn’t stressed these days? But as the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months, Sarah began to realize that something had to change. She couldn’t keep going on like this, feeling like a hamster on a never-ending wheel of stress and anxiety.
“Stress involves changes affecting nearly every system of the body, influencing how people feel and behave. By causing mind–body changes, stress contributes directly to psychological and physiological disorder and disease and affects mental and physical health, reducing quality of life.” – American Psychological Association
So, one day, Sarah decided to take matters into her own hands. She sat down at her kitchen table, a steaming cup of tea in hand, and began to brainstorm ways to tackle her stress head-on. She scoured the internet for tips and tricks, devouring articles and posts on stress management like a woman possessed.
After much deliberation, Sarah came up with a plan of action. First on the agenda: self-care. She vowed to carve out time each day for activities that nourished her body and soul, whether it was taking a stroll in the park or indulging in a long, hot bubble bath or any hobbies, something that she enjoyed doing. Although these helped her relax she was still not feeling fine.
Next, Sarah decided to prioritize her mental health. She reached out to a therapist for support, eager to explore strategies for managing her stress and anxiety in a healthy way. And let me tell you, those therapy sessions were like a breath of fresh air for Sarah, providing her with the tools and techniques she needed to cope with life’s ups and downs.
According to research studies, Cognitive behavioral therapy is shown to be highly effective in treating conditions like stress and mental problems (e.g., anxiety disorder, attention deficit hypersensitivity disorder, bulimia nervosa, depression, hypochondriasis), physical conditions (e.g., chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia, irritable bowel syndrome, breast cancer), and behavioral problems (e.g., antisocial behaviors, drug abuse, gambling, overweight, smoking). Mental and physical problems can likely be managed effectively with online CBT.
But perhaps the most important step Sarah took was learning to say no. She realized that she couldn’t do it all, and that’s okay. She began to set boundaries and delegate tasks, refusing to let guilt or obligation dictate her actions.
As the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned into months, Sarah began to notice a shift. The restlessness and sleepless nights began to fade, replaced by a sense of calm and clarity. The tension headaches became a thing of the past, a distant memory of a time when stress ruled her life.
And so, dear reader, Sarah’s story serves as a reminder that no matter how overwhelming life may seem, there is always hope. By taking small steps each day to prioritize our well-being, we can reclaim our inner peace and live life on our terms. However, if self-help strategies aren’t helping, reach out to an experienced psychologist who would help you navigate through this path.